A breakthrough for the sake of breakthroughs...

If you see my "sister blog" you will see that I had a breakdown. A long-ago adopted blog title has been my year. I moved to Seattle, Washington, following my family and the hope for an exciting beginning, close to a year ago now. I left behind the man I thought I would marry, in desperate hopes that he would follow me and this time, bring a ring. I thudded to a harsh reality when I saw the truth in what he had been telling me: he was not ready to commit to me. After tears upon tears and feelings of betrayal and loneliness, I am still struggling these 9 months later to let go. Let go of any hope that he is the one for me, and let go of the relationship that I thought we'd always share. The worst part about the heartbreak is that it has been one-sided. I was the only one who imploded on myself and began to question who I was if I wasn't his.

That journey has undoubtedly been the toughest I've gone through. Agonizing, yet self-actualizing. In the midst of this journey, I've experienced a lot of other things (although all minuscule in comparison to the size and weight of my broken heart): I was hired to do a job where I felt I reached a lot of my potential...and fired for being too immature to handle office politics; I got my very first condo, which was a dream home for anyone, and especially for someone of my age...then moved out of it, shortly after being fired; I moved back in with my family only to realize that their problems were things that I am completely useless to resolve, yet forced to sit and watch them pain the people I love.

So here is where I am out now: Headed to Europe on some vagabond-esque journey. I leave in two days and am without a return date, plan to return, or plan of what I'll do after I return. I'm not even so sure of what I'll do while I'm in Europe. This is kind of a crazy, spontaneous, perhaps irresponsible adventure that I'm hoping leads to some grand epiphany or perhaps even a tiny one. Famous authors and philosophers have often discussed the wonders of traveling on the soul and the answers that one can find without even having a question. This is me. Chasing after something to which I have no identification of. I could be the most naive of all fools... Or I could be embarking on something truly wonderful. My hope is in the latter, along with all of my faith in those wise men (and women) who've done this before me and spoken volumes of its results.

I have a "travel blog", but I feel I am most comfortable here. In the silence of not having followers or fans, critics or contenders. Here I can speak to the secrets of my heart, the moments of triumph, the times I feel lost and homesick... Here I can turn inward and express it it outward. Wish me luck...And Cheers!!